Prepare to get your Lincoln on this year…
Yes, folks, there are at least three (3) Lincoln movies coming your way in 2012, and two of them involve Lincoln fighting various monsters in history mashup genre bending tales of what if history. Or just dumb stories about Lincoln killing things. Either way, the movies are coming, and you’ll just have to deal with them!First up is Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter, based on Seth Grahame-Smith’s novel. Seth Grahame-Smith is the guy who started those awful mashup books that mix public domain stories with werewolves and zombies and crap. Soon everyone rushed to make a cheap buck, and now the bookstore shelves are littered with this garbage, making it harder to find novels about space babes kicking butt. I mean, harder to find William Shakespeare books. Yeah, that’s it! So Lincoln had a secret journal where he killed vampires, and vampires caused the Civil War and are responsible for slavery! Timur Bekmambetov directs, and Benjamin Walker, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Rufus Sewell, Jimmi Simpson, Dominic Cooper, and Alan Tudyk star.
Not to be outdone, the Asylum has their own Lincoln killing things movie: Abraham Lincoln vs. Zombies!
Just check out this poster:
And also there’s a boring true life biography of Lincoln coming out, called Lincoln. Steven Spielberg directs it and Daniel Day-Lewis is Lincoln. Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Jared Harris, Tommy Lee Jones, Jackie Earle Haley, James Spader, and Sally Field also star. It will probably be good and get Oscar noms. If you’re into that sort of stuff.
Categories: Movie News Tags: Abraham Lincoln vs. Zombies, Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter, Alan Tudyk, Asylum, Benjamin Walker, Daniel Day-Lewis, Dominic Cooper, Jackie Earle Haley, James Spader, Jared Harris, Jimmi Simpson, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Rufus Sewell, Sally Field, Steven Spielberg, Timur Bekmambetov, Tommy Lee Jones
2 Headed Shark Attack test footage
Some test footage from the upcoming Asylum picture 2 Headed Shark Attack has popped up on YouTube. You will believe two jaws are better than one!
via writer H. Perry Horton on TwitterCategories: Kaiju News, Movie News Tags: 2 Headed Shark Attack, Asylum, Brooke Hogan, Carmen Electra, Chris Ray, H. Perry Horton
2 Headed Shark Attack poster and stills!
2 Headed Shark Attack has moved closer to completion with a poster and some official stills. The gemi-shark is ready to chomp it’s way through dozens of teenage tasty treats. And hopefully Brooke Hogan, Charlie O’Connell, and Carmen Electra as well. Christopher Douglas-Olen Ray directs.The plot:
When a Semester at Sea ship is sunk by a mutated two-headed shark, the survivors escape to a deserted atoll. But when it starts flooding, the coeds are no longer safe from the double jaws of the monster.
Here’s some images from the official Flickr page, plenty more there:
Categories: Kaiju News, Movie News Tags: 2 Headed Shark Attack, Asylum, Brooke Hogan, Carmen Electra, Charlie O'Connell, Chris Ray
2 Headed Shark Attack Gemi-Shark pic!
Asylum has released a photo of the two-headed shark (dubbed the Gemi-Shark) from their upcoming 2 Headed Shark Attack film on their Facebook page. Gaze into both faces of sea terror! Which head will be the evil head? Find out when the movie airs, I guess. I predict both heads will be evil.
Two heads chomp more than one!
Categories: Kaiju News, Movie News Tags: 2 Headed Shark Attack, Asylum
2 Headed Shark Attack!! plus Almighty Thor trailer
Wait, WHAT???? I was just checking in on the Asylum to see the new Thor mockbuster trailer when suddenly I saw their coming soon list had…2 Headed Shark Attack! No other info is available at this time. Two heads are deader than one!
Also here is the trailer for Almighty Thor:
Yes, you saw Thor shooting an uzi at dinosaurs in the middle of a city.
Almighty Thor coming May 7 on Syfy. Richard Grieco is Loki. Kevin Nash is some guy.
Categories: Kaiju News, Movie News Tags: 2 Headed Shark Attack, Almighty Thor, Asylum, Kevin Nash, Richard Grieco
Mega Shark vs Gigantosaurus
Asylum’s followup to Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus will be Mega Shark vs Gigantosaurus. I am not sure how that will work, as Gigantosaurus is a land-dwelling dinosaur that is a sauropod (think Brontosaurus) but the poster art is basically a giant T-Rex. So we got a T-Rex fighting a giant shark, who in the last film was taking a bite out of airplanes. Okay. Let’s hope for the best! Maybe they’ll have more actual monster stuff in this one! Horror-Movies.ca noticed the poster art in a CNN video and Avery emailed everyone in the universe.
Categories: Kaiju News, Movie News Tags: Asylum, Avery, kaiju, Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus, Mega Shark vs Gigantosaurus
Movie News Droppings
The Spiderman reboot, which looks like they are going to go all Twilight with (sigh…), will also be in in 3-D. So expect sparkly Spiderman shooting webbing directly at the camera while obsessed pale Mary Jane spends large portions of the film sitting in a chair, depressed. Then Werewolf Goblin takes off his shirt.
The remake of Escape From New York is moving forward, as now we got dirty bombs, a non-trashed New York that is still a prison, and Snake rescuing a female senator instead of the President, probably so he can bang her. It will still be terrible.
The Superman reboot will be “Godfathered” by Chris Nolan, of Dark Knight fame. Basically, they will give him a bunch of cash to tell them if their ideas are dumb so they can try to make a billion dollars again, But they probably won’t listen and they’ll make another bomb. Meanwhile, the important news is that Nolan has an idea for the third Batman film, and he and his brother are writing the script.
In non-reboot news, Roland Emmerich is still making Asimov’s Foundation Trilogy, and now it will be 3D Motion Capture, because he can demand more money from YOU! I am officially over 3D, and even the promise of a 3D Mule won’t get me back into it. This news is so bad I wish I had more reboot news…
Foywonder has discovered that Asylum is making Titanic 2. Yes.
Black Dynamite was awesome, and can now be yours!
Categories: Movie News Tags: Asimov, Asylum, Batman, Black Dynamite, Chris Nolan, Christian Bale, Escape From New York, Foundation, Roland Emmerich, Spiderman, Superman, Titanic 2
