The Chronicles of Rick Roll
The Chronicles of Rick Roll shows that just when you think mankind might be moving on to a better world, you’re wrong and hell and we’re all gonna die! 2012 and the end can’t get here soon enough! Nuke it all, nuke everyone, from A to Z. From Aaron A. Aaronson to Zachary Z. Zzaaronson. Nuke the world, and nuke it again. Just to make sure.The Chronicles of Rick Roll is a concept trailer where someone who got a hold of Tosh.0′s email contact list got a bunch of viral video people together to make a horrible film, this concept trailer being used to get more money. I was sad that I recognized so many faces in the trailer, but when i saw the expanded cast list I became happy that I recognized so few! So hooray for me! But BOOOOO! for everyone, because The Chronicles of Rick Roll will probably get the $8 they need to turn this film into a reality. Where it will be released on YouTube. And get less views than a kitten playing with string.
Cast includes: Antoine Dodson (Bed Intruder), The Double Rainbow guy, Ben Schultz (Leeroy Jenkins), Stephen Quire (Freakout Kid), Mark Hicks (Afro Ninja), Catie Wayne (Boxxy), Matt Sloan & Aaron Yonda (Chad Vader), Tay Zonday (Chocolate Rain), Michael Copper (Copper Cab), David DeVore (David After Dentist), Judson Laipply (Evolution of Dance), and Ted Williams (Man with the Golden Voice)
Categories: Movie News, WTF? Tags: The Chronicles of Rick Roll, YouTube
Age of the Dragons is Moby Dick gone dragons
Somehow this is a real movie and not an internet joke. We have a reimagining of Moby Dick, except with dragons, and a land boat (?!), and a scarred Danny Glover with Vinnie Jones also running around for some reason. I am sure someone thought this was an awesome idea at some time, but it isn’t this person. I think had they ditched the land boat thing it would have been less ridiculous looking.
The pellet with the poison's in the flagon with THIS MOVIE IS POISON!
Categories: Kaiju News, Movie News Tags: Age of the Dragons, Danny Glover, Vinnie Jones, YouTube
Categories: Movie News Tags: Blackstar Warrior, YouTube
Premakes – The Empire Strikes Back
This is pretty much the coolest thing ever and I wish it was real…
Categories: Movie News Tags: Star Wars, YouTube
Kuky Returns will be awesome
Yes, Kuky Returns, a film you have never heard of unless you follow news on cult movie sites that have suddenly taken an interest in it, will be awesome. A stop-motion-ish children’s film about a stuffed bear and his return to his child owner who was forced to lose the bear due to asthma. Thus, Kuky the bear gets involved in a magical adventure with all sorts of crazy stuff. I haven’t bothered to pay attention to Czech film much due me already having too many countries that I pay attention to. But I’ll pay attention to this film. And you should too.English trailer:
Other trailers:
Categories: Movie News Tags: Kuky Returns, trailer, YouTube
Movie News Droppings…
Thanks to the commute time of work eating up two hours a day (that’s ten hours a week!) for at least the next few months, movie news is going to suffer. Thus, out from that comes larger news bites posts instead of individual posts for every bit of news that comes along. We shall still be selecting news via the patented TarsTarkas.NET selection method: whatever the heck we want to until we get bored or distracted.
So let’s bring on the movie news!
Hot Tub Time Machine looks like it will be awesome. The trailer embedded below is the safe for work trailer, but you should probably also check out the NSFW trailer somewhere.
Big Money Rustlas is not just a juggalo movie, it’s a prequel to a juggalo movie! It will be absolutely awful. Kill your children if you like this film.
What fighting video game franchises are left that don’t have terrible movies made of them yet? Tekken gets scratched off the list, making me hope the Primal Rage movie will be out by the end of the decade. Isn’t there supposed to be a giant bear in Tekken?
Speaking of crappy fighting video game movies, Mortal Kombat will get another film. This is where I would make a joke about someone needing to put a fatality on this film franchise if that joke wasn’t way too obvious.
Hong Kong is coming out with four (!) competing films about Guan Yu. We have the Benny Chan directed Louis Koo vehicle Legend of Military God, Yang Zi’s Military Saint Yun Chang, Liu Heng’s Guan Gong, and Guan Yun Chang, which may star Donnie Yen if he accepts. Wait until 2011 when Hong Kong will produce 12 biopics of Yan Wang just because they can.
Finally, for all you monster fans, SyFy (sigh…) is having a contest to Name That SyFy Movie! Obviously this movie about Demons in the Holy Land needs to be named Sasquatch vs. Crocodile.
Categories: Movie News Tags: Big Money Ruslas, Hot Tub Time Machine, Mortal Kombat, SciFi Channel, Tekken, YouTube
